When women rage

Commenting on the video of a wife having a tantrum Res Ipsa said the following:

And yet there are so many women out there who blame the men because they don't want to get married.

There are two reasons men will confirm why they don't want to marry in light of seeing this video. The first is because of the potential of marrying a woman who will behave this way. They don't even want to go there. They have an expectation of women that is, in today's society, unfortunately unrealistic. When women are raised in feminist households with all the ills to a family that brings, many will behave this way in some manner. While they may not resort to pitching a fit like the woman in the video, they will still not know how to deal with disappointment and anger in a mature way or with a quiet gentle spirit. They have grown up witnessing indignant women and being told that it is right and acceptable. Their church hasn't addressed it, their mothers display it, their teachers and professors promote it and society accepts it.

The second reason dovetails with the first only this group of men do not have an unrealistic expectation of women, they know this behavior can exist within them and they know exactly what they would do about it to change the behavior. The problem is they are legally prohibited from the right course of action. They know that should they discipline their wives she has the law and the courts standing in her corner ready to slap his hand, take his money, take his children, and in many cases imprison him for doing what is right to do.

There are men who don't care, however. They will marry knowing their wives might have rage within them, they know what they will do to discipline and correct the behavior and they don't care what the potential consequences could be. These are the men who many times have wives who will receive the correction, who will not pursue divorce, who will not listen to the feminist voices: "How dare he do that to you?" "You're just too stupid to leave him." "He has no right to discipline you." They also have no stomach for the white knights: "He's not treating you the way you deserve to be treated, princess." "A real man walks away." "A real man listens and tries to understand." These women are highly attracted to their husbands and develop great respect for their authority.

Now, if you are a woman who does not rage within, who has always possessed a quiet gentle spirit, who is emotionally mature and rational, I'm not addressing you. I'd like you to go to whomever it was who raised you or instilled this within you and thank them. If you're a man married to a woman like this, take note of how she was raised and do the very same thing with your daughters.

In his post The new Chris Brown, Vox states:

As I have frequently observed, there is no such thing as equality in any material sense, least of all sexual equality.  And any man who somehow manages to get physically beaten up by a woman renders himself a gamma; no alpha would ever accept such treatment regardless of the subsequent legal consequences.  The very fact that a man is physically attacked in the first place is indicative of the woman's belief in his low socio-sexual status.
Women don't dare are much less inclined to attack alphas, not even with the full force of an anti-male legal regime behind them.  They understand that an alpha would much rather spend the rest of his life in prison than live it knowing he submitted to a physical assault by a woman without responding.  It is silly to say that a man who won't defend himself against women isn't a man, but it is a strong evidence that he is a man of average or lower socio-sexual status.

Dr. Helen responds to this post but misses the point (highlight mine):

Vox asks a good question, will Emma Roberts be condemned like Chris Brown? Probably not, but even he seems to believe that a man who does not defend himself is low status. Bull. Women hit men all the time and that doesn’t mean they are low status. I get that Vox thinks the woman thinks the guy is low status but that tells more about what she thinks she can get away with, not the man’s actual value as a person. We need to focus on abusive women and how to deal with them, not try to determine if a man is low status for being hit. I frankly don’t care for ranking men or women in this way–gamma, beta, alpha. Good grief.

Focusing on abusive or rage filled women necessarily means changing our feminist society. There is no amount of psychological analysis, pharmaceuticals, or self help books that will change the underlying cause of the rage within women. In fact, I have not known of a rage filled woman to become one of a quiet gentle spirit without God and His plan for order within the family. Feminism did not cause this in women, it has always existed:

Better to dwell in the wilderness,
Than with a contentious and angry woman. Proverbs 21:19

But a feminist society makes the very worst in women flourish and become the norm. 

Vox's post allows men to rank themselves if they chose to do so, but more importantly it highlights who the men are who don't get hit by women (twice). Who don't allow for rage filled women in their lives. Should the man who has a rage filled wife desire to institute change then he should observe success and emulate it. An outside source telling his wife she is wrong, while her husband condones her behavior (by his inaction) will never change her. Well, I take that back, if it changes her, what will also change is her attraction to her husband. When, for years, he allows rage filled outbursts and abusive behavior to exist within his home, and he doesn't play a role in her transformation, she will lose respect for him. Instinctively she will think "If he couldn't protect his own self from me, how could he possibly protect our family from external forces?"  

In order to maintain the marriage, men, you must be part of the change that takes place within her. No, this is not a "man up" message. The choice is yours, I'm just telling you what will happen if she matures without your input. In fact, I apologize in advance, if your wife is reading this and the two of you know she has rage filled outbursts and tantrums, and you have allowed it to happen, she is losing respect for you and attraction to you while she reads. Even if she is indignant towards me and about to post a hand waving "I'll tell her" comment on this blog, she is still losing whatever respect she has had for you. 

It's a rigged game, men. I'd like to tell you that we can change society and women to be rational creatures that will respect their husbands unconditionally. I'll do my part with my daughters and hopefully encourage other parents to do the same. But, in the mean time, this remains the state of our society in the ruins of the feminist machine. However: 

“With men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

Now for some personal anecdotes. A few things will come of this for you. Some of you will read and feel proud, "I can't believe SD did these things, I'd never behave like that." - and if it's true, good for you. No really, I'm glad that you've maintained self control and rational behavior all your life, I used to envy women like that. They make for fantastic examples of hope for us crazy ones. There's no reason to be haughty about it, however. If that is your first reaction, please check yourself.

Then there are some of you that will be thinking, "Thank God I'm not the only one. While that video was extreme, I, too, have been an out of control, temper tantruming, petulant child who needed a spanking."

RLB's family has several stories that get repeated often. While they are sources of great comedy and laughter among us, there is always a lesson in them. Most relevant to this was the time his mom had a fit and threw a chair at his dad. Dad grabbed her, bent her over his knee and spanked her. When he was finished he said, "If you are going to act like a child, I'm going to treat you like one." 

Precedent set. This is how the men deal with unruly women in this family. I was told this story early on. 

"They are never going to last." - said by my roommate at our wedding reception. She'd be the one to know. She got to witness some great Friday night fights. RLB's response to my tantrums was to sleep. If I got physical with him, he would restrain me with his arms, tell me to stop and then he'd tune me out and sleep. Our fights were always after a night of drinking so this worked well for him. He'd leave me to pitch my fit all alone until, like an exhausted toddler, I'd finally fall asleep. I'd be embarrassed and humbled in the morning but we'd carry on. After one night the evidence of my fit was a hole in the wall of our living room. He was sleeping in the next room while I was screaming at him and kicking the wall. I never did that again. I was so ashamed every time I'd look at the wall. Of course we didn't fix it. RLB would laugh at me every time he'd tell someone how it happened (he still does). 

One week after our wedding we attended one of his friend's weddings. Again I drank heavily and started having an insecure jealous fit on the ride home. I don't remember what it was all about or what RLB was doing but I do remember opening the truck door (while he was driving 50 MPH) and my shoe fell off. He stopped the truck asked me what I was doing in not so nice words and we got out to look for my shoe. I was still screaming at him so he slapped my face and told me to knock it off. It stunned and sobered me and made me shut up and realize how crazy I had been behaving. 

I've told the story how after we were married things began to change with RLB. His attitude that made me crazy about him started to become more passive. He went through a long period of financial stress that brought out his inner Delta. During a fight we were having, I slapped him and broke the arm off his glasses. His reaction was unfortunate. He quietly looked at me with disdain, put his broken glasses back on and walked away from me. I was sorry for what I had done, I knew I was out of control and he didn't deserve this treatment. I didn't know what to do with myself. He continued to wear the glasses, which he taped, for years after the incident. He refused to buy a new pair. While it did shame me, it also had a very negative influence on my attraction to him. 

Fast forward a few years. We were no longer having fights of this nature. I had been reading the Bible and marriage books trying to change the rage within me. It wasn't completely gone, unfortunately. We were driving to a meeting and again, I don't remember what our argument was about, I was likely being very disrespectful and snotty and he'd had enough. He said something to me I didn't like and I threw my coffee at him. He pulled the car over quick, reached across and grabbed my neck, pinned me up against the car door and informed me how I will never do anything like that again. 

I haven't. 

RLB can, quite easily kill me with one hand. I learned that that night and have never wanted to incite him in that way again. The realization of his strength and willingness to use it has contributed greatly to my very high attraction to him. 

I know some of you still struggle with why that is true. You're still swallowing that bitter red pill and are hopeful that something is just wrong with me, that there are women out there not like this. I'm sure there are but I'm afraid with the way the majority of women have been raised today, it will be a long arduous search for you. Accepting that profound physical dominance is a very attractive trait in a man for a woman would be much more simple for you. 

We use these examples to teach our daughters. While it is still humbling for me, I continue to be very grateful for the discipline and correction RLB has patiently given me. I no longer have rage within me. In fact it's been four years since my heart rate has elevated due to irrational fear or anger. A vertically aligned marriage and obedience to God's commands in marriage quiets the spirit. It calms the rage and softens our countenance.

Please don't misunderstand, I am still an extroverted person. That I can not change. I still am very passionate and expressive. And, there are times I fail to control my tongue and indignation. But not with him. It isn't fear either. It is great respect, admiration, submission and very high attraction. It is also trust. I trust him to correct me when I'm wrong and I trust him to protect me and our family.