Saturday, April 27, 2013

Broken into Beautiful

I'm going to switch gears in a big way with this post. I've got to tell you, I am at the end of what I can stomach of the charge against the lost and the lied to.

If you are a young woman reading this blog, I pray you can find understanding in why men are given to vitriolic rants about women and the lies they're living.

Young women have been lied to just as much as young men. Feminism is a bitter poison that has infiltrated our society, our churches and our homes.

If you are a young woman who has bought the lie. If you have given your virginity to a man who isn't your husband. If you have believed that sexual promiscuity is an expression of strength and independence, I urge you to repent of your sins. Ask for forgiveness from your Savior, Jesus Christ. Turn away from those lies. Move on in obedience to God's word.

I know you. I lived it.

I am a living, breathing, very blessed, victory story of what can become of the lost and the broken. I indulged in sexual sin to the extent that I should have been unworthy of any blessing in life. I know what self loathing is. I know what it is to give sex in exchange for attention. I know what it is to give sex in exchange for anything that would validate my self worth and would wake up to disgust, worthlessness, and rejection. I know what it is to live in rebellion and denial of its consequences.

You are not alone.

But you are responsible.

However, here's the deal. You can, right now, change. You can repent. You can be forgiven. You can go and sin no more. You can heal. And, you can enter into a relationship with your Savior.

All that you have been seeking can be found in your relationship with God who loves you.

You have come to know that the validation you feel of a guy's arms around you is only temporary. It's temporary and it can not sustain your need. Your emptiness is not because of your lack of a man, who isn't your husband. Your emptiness comes from the lie. Your emptiness is because of your rebellion. What is empty within you can only be filled with the grace you will know when you've gone to the Lord, asked for forgiveness and repented of your sins.

I pray for you, that you go from Broken Into Beautiful: 

She’s smiling on the outside
But she’s hurting on the inside
It’s getting hard just living anymore
And the shadows she has clung to
Painful things that she has been through
Have left her feeling worthless, Lord… but
You change worthless into precious
Guilty to forgiven
Hungry into satisfied
Empty into full
All the lies are shattered
And we believe we matter
When You change broken into beautiful
We live with accusations
Sometimes heavy expectations
That tell us we can never measure up
And yet You repeat with mercy
That in your eyes we are worthy
At last we see how much we’re loved cause

Though we can’t see how we can stand before you Lord
And feel valued, priceless and adored

Please, no male comments on this. 


  1. My father always told me the greatest gift I could give to my husband is my virginity. He was a great man with wise words. He raised me to have old fashioned values ( I use old fashioned due to not too many girls in my generation were virgins past the 9th grade). He told me to treat my husband as I would want him, my father to be treated. I received quite a bit of flack for it, teased for being a virgin by my closest female friends while my male friends respected me more for it even though at times they would give me a teasing now and then. I will say that I almost went against myself and gave in from all the teasing but in the end I held out as I wasn't sure if it was more of not wanting to disappoint my father or myself or my future husband.

    When I was 18 I was raped and I struggled with it as not only did I feel dirty but I felt that I lost the greatest gift to give to my husband, I even had thoughts of suicide. Through counseling and talking with my pastor I realized that I still had that gift to give because what I experience wasn't a choice nor was it given out of love. Even my husband saw it as that.

    Upon dating my husband he thought at first I did not like him due to even after our second date I did not kiss him so his friend called me and I explained that I did not believe in kissing until at least the third date if not later (I'm not sure why I came up with third date, was it my shyness, was it because I was scared to admit that I never kissed a boy before, or was I afraid to give out that kiss that I never gave anyone yet and I still felt that might be the only gift I had to give since I was raped). Either way I did kiss my future husband on the third date as I didn't want to lose him over something so simple as a kiss, it was just a lip kiss, no tongue involved. When we did get to a real kiss, he knew that I never kissed before and asked, I put my head down and said no, he laughed and I thought I would cry, but his laughter wasn't in teasing, it was in gratitude, he loved that I never kissed a boy before and loved that he was the one to teach me. He now says that my greatness in a kiss is all because of his teaching :) .....

    He did propose after a few months of dating but because of his background of his father married and divorced 5 times as his father had custody I needed him to understand that marriage was a one time deal, that I believed it to be a sin to divorce, that giving up wasn't an option and so I wanted us to take time before making the commitment of a lifetime. He was crushed but he also understood. We finally made love for the first time after a year of dating, no he never pressed it for that year but he finally convince me to cave in before marriage, I agreed due to I already knew this was the man I wanted to be with the rest of my life.

    We did marry finally, after 5 years of dating. This summer it will be 22 years together. He loves that I am old fashioned in my thinking of most things and so even though we have son's he also has stood behind me telling our boys that the greatest gift they could give to their wife is their virginity. We will not allow our boys to date until 16 and we stand firm on that. Our oldest is 20 and still a virgin, he is rather picky in his girlfriends, he has only dated one and it didn't last long as she was a moody one, bossy as well, I am happy her true side came out sooner than later. I am hoping that there are parents out there with our thoughts on dating and sex and they will be able to find the right wife that will take care of them as it is rather rare to find a girl today that believes that a man should be put on a higher pedestal over the woman, but I have some faith that in time my son's will find a woman that was raised with the old fashioned traditions and not the ones that I keep seeing today. But mostly I pray that they will not fall into a feminists trap and marry one.

    1. Thank you for your story, Tazmurf.

      It is so important for fathers to know their influence on their daughters. I am so happy to hear your father's expectations were what you were living up to. I have known several girls who had divorced parents but who's fathers had custody of them - very different life experience than those who were in the custody of single moms.

      as it is rather rare to find a girl today that believes that a man should be put on a higher pedestal over the woman

      I don't know that it is a higher pedestal. What should be clear is the commands God has for us in marriage. What is often viewed as a pedestal is actually a weight of responsibility. I often feel that God's commands for me to submit to and respect my husband are not even close to the responsibility he has to love me (Agape) as Ephesians 5 speaks of. When a woman truly comes to obedience to these commands, it is obvious that the husband's role is mightier and more sacrificial. God bless the men who are obedient to this command.

    Keep going SD. Restoring the years the locasts ate right in front of our eyes. I Praise God for His victory in your life and may it help lead others to Him.

  3. Thank you for being loving enough to say the truth as it is.
    Sex outside of marriage is a sin, is not worth it, and will not fulfill our deep need for a purpose and to be loved.
    Even more so for reminding us all that this is not the end and that grace is available to those who choose Christ and turn from our past.

    Praise God that our sin is not the end and we have Jesus!!

    I am very blessed as to have been the inexperience girl who married her first boyfriend and experienced our first kiss on the lips after our vows. Praying for my sisters to know the redemptive work of God and not believe the feminist lies of the world.
    Thank you again!!


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