Ok, I read as much as I could...regarding submission, my pastor explained it thusly:This sounds good, right? Sounds fair. Sounds equitable. Sounds...almost right.
A marriage is not a General (the man) and a Private (the woman), where the man orders and the woman obeys unconditionally. Instead it is more like a Colonel and a Lt Colonel, where the man has the authority given to him by the General (Christ),and trusts the woman to make decisions on his behalf, but deferring to him when necessary. It's the TRUST that is implicit here. I submit to my husband because he is a wise and godly man and I trust him. He allows me decision making, because he trusts me to make a sensible decisions and knows I will consult him when necessary. He also consults me and wants my opinion and input on decisions, as he trusts my wisdom. we both pray and consult God. It's not complicated, nor is it denigrating to either of us. In any relationship, SOMEONE has to have the final say when there is a disagreement. Since Christ is the head of my husband, who is the head of the household, then obviously he should have the final say. To me, it's a no-brainer. (emphasis mine)
It's not. It's unbiblical.
Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear. - 1 Peter 3:1-2
Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. - Colossians 3:18
Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. - Ephesians 5:22
Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Ephesians 5:24
There is nothing conditional. There is no "if," "because," or "unless."
There's no room for translating it other than how it is stated.
Is my husband a wise man? Yes .
Do I trust him? Yes
Is my husband a Godly man? Yes
Guess what else he is...a fallen wretched sinner who is tempted by the enemy.
Do I submit to him? Yes
Why? Out of obedience to God's Command. Full stop. It has NOTHING to do with him. It is unconditional and without discretion. And when I fail, I am rebuked and I repent for my sin.
And, there is nothing denigrating about this. This is God's command. Repeated several times in the Bible, with no conditions.
It is better to trust in the Lord
Than to put confidence in man. - Psalm 118:8
And what does the Lord say? Submit to your husband.
Do not put your trust in princes,
Nor in a son of man, in whom there is no help. - Psalm 146:3
In whom do we trust? God.
For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God - Romans 3:23
Does your husband sin and fall short of the glory of God? Yes - and you are commanded to submit to him.
I marvel that you are turning away so soon from Him who called you in the grace of Christ, to a different gospel, which is not another; but there are some who trouble you and want to pervert the gospel of Christ. But even if we, or an angel from heaven, preach any other gospel to you than what we have preached to you, let him be accursed. As we have said before, so now I say again, if anyone preaches any other gospel to you than what you have received, let him be accursed.
For do I now persuade men, or God? Or do I seek to please men? For if I still pleased men, I would not be a bondservant of Christ. - Galatians 1:6-10
Now, notice Rootietoot said: "I read as much as I could..."
She can correct me if I'm wrong but I read that to mean, "I read up until there was something I did not like and stopped reading."
It would be quite interesting to know how many women and men read as much as they feel comfortable reading from 1 Peter and Ephesians before their equality filters kick in and they stop. "My pastor says this... (followed by supplicating, femcentric, appeasing drivel that has nothing to do with what the Bible says.)" - Time to get a new pastor.
If you believe you will succeed without following God's commands, best of luck to you.
If you find Christianity off putting because of God's commands, that's fine too - you may go to hell.